I miss my Neighbour

I miss my neighbour,
She was eaten by a snake.
She was outside in her garden,
Tap tapping with her rake.

The snake came up behind her,
And bit her on the bum.
It tasted her, and found her good,
I heard it say, “yum, yum".

There was a lot of her to eat,
And this is most significant.
For the snake now had a fearful bulge,
A neighbour-shaped predicament.

It tried to slither back away,
Out of the midday sun.
But truth be told, it sludged and groaned,
It must have weighed a tonne.

It tried to squeeze back down its hole,
But the hole was much too narrow.
And that is when I seized my chance,
And attacked it with a trowel.

I slashed it open and tried to drag,
My neighbour out to safety.
But I may have slashed a bit too hard,
And my trowel, it is quite weighty.

And that is why your honour, sir,
I end up here today,
And how it is, those officers,
Found my bloody DNA.

Rod Webb
May 29 2021

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Comments:

Clever and very funny

Janette Ostle
May 29 2021

Great fun, silly and gruesome but hilarious with it.

Tony Spencer
May 29 2021