In the Beginning

Space. It’s vast and empty. At least, it used to be, but in one corner (or perhaps it was somewhere in the middle) something big was about to happen.

It started as a non-descript ball. That’s all I can say about it, because the main description about non-descript things is that they’re usually indescribable.

Besides. I wasn’t there first-hand to see it.

But the space around this non-descript ball is easy to describe because there was nothing in it. Just big, black, empty space. Quiet, ordered and logical. A bit like Finland, but quieter, and more ordered. It wasn’t logical though, because Finland hadn’t been created yet.

Then it all changed. That indescribable ball took care of that. An explosion with energy so vast and so violent that it created matter, and then dispersed it into every corner of that enormous space. Like cooking popcorn with the lid off the pan. It was quite a spectacle to watch, and indeed the bespeckled astrophysicists were amazed at the wonder of it.

Even the theoretical physicists looked up from their books, peering over their half-moon glasses to have a quick glance. It needed to be quick; they were busy creating a new branch of physics until one them pointed out they hadn’t actually yet evolved and therefore didn’t exist. There was a brief meeting where they got their knickers in a knot, but they finally concluded that since time also didn’t exist then the order of events didn’t matter. And besides, they may as well finish what they had started.

Then all the big-banging stopped and all the big bang scientists got mightily angry because they had to start again. But at least now everything was ordered and made sense. Like their drawers where they kept their pants and socks.

Now that time had been created - and much of it had been spent figuring out the sock drawer assembly instructions - the scientists wanted some time off.  They had a look around and found a blue and white planet they fancied calling home.

The marketing department thought calling it “home” would be too ambiguous so they named it “Earth” which is what the indigenous gardeners called the muddy brown stuff they stuck sticks into and watched the sticks grow leaves along lines based on simple fractal geometry.

The astrobiologists among the settlers were so excited they grabbed handf...

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Paul Sterlini
Sep 11 2021

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